Shooting Star

Startled, she looked over at the girl who stood almost 5 feet away from her, having silently come up the stairs next to her. The girl wasn’t looking at her, but straight ahead towards the commotion happening at the far side of the room. “Marissa,” she heard someone say. The girl’s head turned to her right towards the guy who said it. Marissa nodded her head in greeting as he stood. She shifted her backpack on her left shoulder, knocking it slightly into her, making her take a step to the side. She looked over at her, their eyes meeting. “Sorry,” she said softly, her voice low and soft. “It’s okay,” she heard herself respond, unable to look away from her eyes for some reason. The room was bathed in low light and she couldn’t tell what color her eyes were, but it didn’t seem to matter, the reaction she had to her being one of surprise at having found such a beautiful girl standing beside her. The girl broke eye contact and turned to talk to the guy that came up to her, his eyes first on her, then Marissa as he started to talk. He had been looking at her since she had come to the house party, sort of unnerving her. They were inquisitive, but dark as they looked her over. Interest. She hadn’t given him any indication she was interested but still he seemed to follow her from room to room. She walked over to where her friend was standing, talking to the host. The party was getting too rowdy, the guy who owned the apartment wanting to get everyone to leave. “Two houses down everyone,” he yelled out, the crowd dispersing slowly. She went outside with him and her friend Penny, taking a seat on the balcony, watching some of the party goers leave below as they talked. “We should go to Club M soon,” he said, motioning up at the full moon. Big party tonight. The guy who had been following her around came out onto the porch. “Hey Johnson, you all want to go to Club M?” he asked him. The guy held up his thumb and forefinger rubbing them together. The host nodded, “You know I got you. Tell Marissa and James to come too.” Johnson nodded, giving him a smile and looked at her. She let her eyes slide away, finishing the rest of her beer. He made her uncomfortable to say the least. After a few more minutes and a few tokes later, they went back into the house, heading to the front door. They piled into two cars, her being pushed into the middle of the back seat as Penny took the seat next to her. Marissa ducked her head in, looking down at the floor. She was tall but James was taller, so she got stuck in back with them. She got in and their bodies pressed together as the seat was pushed back. She felt her heart pump quicker just being this close to her. She peeked at her under her lashes. Wow. She was so sexy. She couldn’t even tell you what it was about her, it just was there. Chemistry. “Janey,” she said softly in greeting. “Marissa,” she gave her a half-smile. She felt the smile hit her in the gut, her eyes going out the windshield. It had been over a year since she had dated. She was definitely feeling it, that was for sure. This girl made her feel as though she had just been woken up from hibernation. ______________________________________________ Marissa followed everyone into the warehouse, the party in full swing. Strobe lights hanging from three different areas. She saw a friend of hers DJing. Everyone X’d out or just hanging on the big couches everywhere, wall to wall. She sighed. What she had hoped to do was stay over at Pete’s and just veg out, maybe take a shower and actually sleep. But Pete obviously had other plans and she knew he wouldn’t want her to stay when he wasn’t home. Pete took Penny’s hand and headed towards the bar. She knew Pete was their lender tonight and wondered if she should go with them but decided not to, standing next to the girl who introduced herself as Janey. An absolutely heart-breaking looker of a girl. Girls like her didn’t just walk around her neck of the woods unless maybe they were trying to throw change at her. Long honey colored hair, large blue/green eyes and a voice that made her look twice. It was like a breath of fresh air, just being around her. It made her feel dirty as she looked down at herself for a moment. Hell, she had washed her clothes maybe three days ago so they weren’t that bad. She hoped. Not that this girl would give her a second glance. She looked over at her. She saw Johnson looking at Janey from nearby and she saw her artfully ignore him. Johnson could be pretty damn obnoxious when he wanted something and it was obvious he wanted Janey but it didn’t look like Janey was altogether comfortable with the idea. “Do you want to get a drink?” Janey asked her, her eyes going to her and then to the bar on the other side of the room. She nodded at her and let her lead the way through the dancing crowd, stepping over the legs of people sitting against the wall. They got to the bar and the bartender recognized her, nodding. She nodded back as Janey asked her what she wanted. “Whatever you’re having,” she responded, reaching into her pocket for the last bill she had, a ten she hoped. “No it’s okay, I have it,” Janey said, touching her arm slightly as she leaned over the bar. Her eyes went to her shirt that gaped lightly revealing her lace bra and she immediately looked away, over her shoulder. She hadn’t seen breasts that nice in a long time and well, that was just the tops of them. Janey paid the bar keep, pushing her drink towards her, “Thanks,” she said to her, bending her head so that she could hear her over the music. “You’re welcome,” Janey smiled up at her. She took half of the drink in one swallow. Vodka Tonic. Good Vodka too. She hadn’t eaten except for a few pieces of toast that morning and her stomach was coated with warmth from the liquor. They moved away from the bar, Janey perching herself in one of the window sills and they watched the crowd move together to the Drum and Bass. She had some crystal in her bag. Was given it for free and had been saving it. Maybe she wanted some. She didn’t normally share any of her stuff with anyone. Give them an inch and they took a mile. Well, it was the least she could do. “Do you want some meth?” she asked, sitting down on the ledge with her. Janey’s eyes met hers, “I’m okay. Go ahead.” She felt herself relax, glad she hadn’t taken the offer for some reason. Not because she didn’t want to share, but because maybe it meant she wasn’t a user, a hanger-on. Johnson would’ve tried to take the whole damn bag. “I’m good,” she shrugged, and she was. Sometimes she just liked to get away, be happy for a few brief moments. But she found being around her actually made her feel less heavy. It was a nice feeling. Janey was wearing expensive looking jeans, strategic fading in place and frayed at the bottoms with flip flops on her feet as was the trend. She could tell she wasn’t on the streets like she was. Nothing wrong with that. She had nothing against kids who had it better than she did unlike some of her aquaintances. She had smelled nice in the car, something feminine, probably her shampoo. Last time she took a shower, she used soap for her hair. She ran her hand through her ponytail, it feeling soft. That’s what not washing it for a few days did. Give it a few more and it wouldn’t be so great. They sat for awhile, Pete and Janey’s friend Penny coming over to hang out for a bit. Pete got them drinks and she felt herself actually sort of enjoy herself. Janey didn’t speak much, which was fine by her. She wasn’t much of a talker herself. It didn’t feel uncomfortable and being with her didn’t feel forced. After awhile, Pete decided to head to another club but Janey shook her head when her friend said she should go too. “I think I’m done for the night,” she said softly. Johnson looked like he wanted to say something to her, but then decided to follow Pete out, knowing he was a sure bet. She herself felt undecided. She didn’t feel like going to another club and didn’t feel like dealing with Johnson. They went outside and she hesitated, watching Janey try to hail a cab. She hitched her bag up on her shoulder as the cab stopped. “Are you going with Pete?” Janey asked her, as they looked at one another. She shook her head. “Don’t feel like staying out anymore?” she asked her. “Not really,” she responded, her eyes darting away. Ümraniye Escort “Do you want to..maybe hang out? Come over? I can make us something to eat? I’m starving.” Just her saying that made her stomach grumble and both of them heard it. Janey gave her a genuine smile and she felt herself smile back at her. “Come on,” Janey tilted her head and slid into the cab. She stood looking at the door for a moment. Was she just being friendly or did she want something more? She knew Janey probably guessed that some of the folks Pete hung out with lived wherever they could. She hadn’t seemed to mind. Maybe she wanted payment in return for being able to go to her place. She held the cab door open as she got in. Maybe. And maybe she wouldn’t mind…having her in her arms. It would be worth it to have a shower and something to eat and hopefully sleep somewhere nice and warm. She wasn’t some guy that made her skin crawl with wanting to fuck her who she had to turn down time and again. This girl seemed different, sweet. She shut the door, setting her bag on the floor and leaned back as Janey gave the cab driver her address. A brownstone. She knew the area. Had been there a few times when she was younger, when she was still living at home before everything and everyone had gone south. It was a fairly silent ride as the cabby turned the music up and they both looked out the window. Fifteen minutes later the car stopped and Janey opened the door, paying the driver. She followed her out and looked up at the dark complex. No lights on except the front stoop. She wondered if she lived alone. It was almost 4 am so maybe her roommate was asleep. Janey slipped her key in the door and she made her way into the entryway, turning on a hallway light. She turned, closing the door behind her, then watched Janey take off her flip flops, a few other pairs of shoes laying nearby. She followed suit, taking off her shoes. She knew from being in different people’s places to pay attention to things like that, not wanting to be kicked out for not following the host rules. It could mean the difference between a nice dry place to sleep and a cardboard box in an alley. “You can leave your bag right here if you want?” Janey asked, pointing to a stairwell. She took it off her shoulder, placing it on the staircase, then moved behind her into a large kitchen as she turned on the light. “Are leftovers okay? I made lasagna last night and have enough for like a week,” Janey gave her a small smile. “I’ll eat anything,” she said softly, taking her coat off. Janey picked up some sort of remote and music started to play from the living room across from them. She put her coat over the kitchen chair and came into the kitchen, shoving her hands in her pockets. “Do you want me to do something?” she asked, watching her pull out containers from the fridge, her mouth starting to water. “Nope, just sit. It’ll be ready in three seconds. Do you want a beer or something?” Janey asked, pulling plates from a large cabinet. “Sure,” she nodded. Janey pulled out two beers, twisting off the tops and handed her one. She thanked her, going to the table and drank part of the beer, trying not to watch her as she made them plates. By the time she brought the plates over she had finished her beer, feeling a little lightheaded. “Thank you,” she said sincerely, looking at the food. “Eat,” Janey smiled picking up her fork. She tried not to wolf it down as she ate quickly, barely tasting it because she was so hungry. “There’s more,” Janey said softly, not even half way done. She felt her face heat and she slowed, taking the last few bites. “Sorry,” she cleared her throat. “Don’t be…eat more if you like,” Janey said, pushing her plate away and taking a long pull on her beer. “I’m good,” she said even though she could’ve eaten two more servings. Janey got up, taking the plates and she watched her walk into the kitchen. “Do you..have a roommate?” she asked her, standing. “No, just me.” Surprised, she looked at the furnishings. It was a nice place, and so was the area. Janey looked her age. Janey saw her looking around. “My folks live in the country and I’m going to school here so it just seemed more logical to live out here.” She nodded, but she didn’t really understand, not being able to fathom parents paying for a place like this. “Do you want another beer?” she asked her. Marissa shook her head, feeling tentative. “It’s late I guess,” Janey said softly. She felt her stomach plummet slightly. She was going to kick her out. At least she was able to get a meal. “Do you want to stay?” Janey asked her, turning off the stereo. She felt her heart speed up, “Yeah?” she asked her. Janey nodded, her hand on the corner of the wall, propping herself up. “Okay,” she gave her a little smile, feeling relieved. Janey smiled, then walked out of the kitchen. She made her way to the stairs and Marissa picked up her bag, following her up the staircase. She walked down the hall behind her and passed a darkened room that looked like it had a large desk and some type of equipment on it coming to another room. Janey turned on the light and she saw this was her bedroom. Large bed, half-made, sheets pulled back. A big TV was on the wall to the left and she saw a bathroom to the right. “I’m sorry, I only have one bed. The other bedroom I converted into an office and the couch isn’t big enough to fully lay on. Is that okay?” Janey asked, looking over at her as she opened a drawer. “Yeah,” she said, looking over at the bathroom. “Can I…use your shower?” she asked, holding her breath. “Of course,” Janey said, turning on the TV. “Awesome,” she let out her breath and went into it, closing the door behind her. She turned and stood stock still, taking herself in, the big mirror not hiding a damn thing. She looked tired. Her long hair coming out from under her paige boy cap. Dark t-shirt, worn jeans with some smudges on them. She raised her arms. Well, at least she didn’t smell. She ran the shower and undressed, gingerly getting in. The hot water hit her and she let out a groan, standing for a full minute under it. She then took a look at what Janey had in her shower. Shampoo and conditioner. Shit, she couldn’t even remember the last time she used conditioner. She used both, the smell like fruit in her hair. She used the body wash, lathering slowly and cleaning as well as possible. Maybe Janey wanted sex. She didn’t want to be dirty. She took out the razor from her bag on the floor. This one she had taken from a three pack at the last house she had been at. She hoped they wouldn’t miss it. She had seen it and realized she hadn’t shaved in months. Why would she really? But seeing the razor had made her think of being cleaner, feeling better. So she had taken it. She used the shaving cream and shaved her armpits and legs, lightly trimming between them as well. After she was done, she made sure she rinsed the tub and then toweled off. She only used a dollop of the lotion that was on the counter, then took out her toothbrush and toothpaste from her bag. She pulled out another shirt and then put on another pair of jeans, putting her other clothes back in her bag. When she came out, Janey was laying in the bed, her eyes sleepy as they rested on the TV. She came to the empty side of the bed and bit her lip, getting into it. “Good shower?” Janey asked, turning to face her. She had changed into what looked like boy shorts and a thin t-shirt and she felt herself want to reach out and touch her. She looked so soft. She nodded, “Thanks for letting me stay.” Janey nodded, “Anytime.” Yeah, she wished but she just smiled at her, resting her head on the pillow, her still damp hair pushed away from her face. “You are so beautiful,” Janey whispered, her eyes on her. She blinked at her, the words seeming to come from nowhere. So she did want sex. And she found it didn’t bother her. “Do you want to…me to…” she started, unsure of how to say it. “What?” Janey asked. “To have sex with you.” Janey’s eyes widened slightly. “Do you want to?” she asked sounding slightly confused. Why did she sound confused? “I…don’t mind,” she admitted, watching her eyes change. Somehow their bodies were closer than before and Janey reached out slowly, her hand gentle against her neck and jaw, her thumb moving Ümraniye Escort Bayan slightly, “I don’t want it to be something you “don’t mind” doing,” Janey whispered, then put her arm around her waist, her head resting on her collarbone. She lay still for a long moment, then felt her own arm snake around Janey’s body, holding her back, her chin resting on her head. Well. Now that was something she hadn’t expected. It had been a long time since anything or anyone had surprised her. Having lived on the street for the last 5 years, she had done a lot of things she wasn’t proud of in order to survive, one of which was to sometimes sleep with people to secure her well-being. She found it a necessary evil at times to stay alive. And she was still alive. And here. It had somehow led her to exactly where she was right now: in a warm safe place with a girl that seemed to good to be true, their bodies wrapped around one another. The TV was barely audible, Janey soft in her arms, and the bed was more comfortable than any bed she had ever been in. Her mind started to completely shut off, her body weary and she wondered at it, never having felt safe like this the entire time she had been on her own. For the first time not fearing she was falling asleep to something different than what she might wake up to. ____________________________________ Janey woke to the sound of a heart beating and she nuzzled into the body holding hers. Her eyes started to open and everything came flooding back. Going with her friend Penny to some guys place she had a crush on from work. Getting a little tipsy and running into this perfect girl who was now in her bed. After they had left to go to the club, she realized that Marissa was homeless. Not just the wary was she carried herself as though she was ready to pick up and take off at any moment, but the way she interacted with other people and her. She carried her darkness with her like a cloak and she found herself being drawn in. She wanted to know this girl. Had seen her in her dreams. Someone who has seen things and lived things that most people should never have to. She could feel her capableness, the way she measured everything. She had to, in order to live on the streets. But unlike Johnson and a few other people at the house she had gone to, Marissa took care of herself. She looked and smelled clean and her eyes weren’t wild, desperate. She could see intelligence behind those dark brown eyes and also a sadness. Still, there was an aura she held that made her almost fight to not look at, wanting to just stare at her. She commanded your attention, the person that you looked at when they walked into a room. She was tall but with a very feminine body, having seen curves even through her baggy jeans. Her hands had made her almost blush. Strong looking as though they had seen a lot of miles but still gentle at the same time. She had offered her place and she could see her hesitance. When she had accepted, she was ecstatic. She didn’t want her to have to try to find another place. And she had been polite, taking off her shoes when she saw she had, and asking her if she wanted help in the kitchen. She wondered how many times she had to act like this in order to get a meal or a place to stay. They hadn’t talked much, but they hadn’t needed to. When she had come out of the shower, she gave up the fight and looked her fill. Her hair was clean and brushed straight, surprisingly long and slightly curly over her shoulders, red streaks running through it. She had put baggy jeans back on and as she climbed into bed, she just wanted to be held by her. She couldn’t help the words that had come out of her mouth, about her being beautiful. And Marissa had misunderstood, thought she wanted what probably other people had asked for in return for giving her things. Sex. It horrified her to think that Marissa would assume that is why she had asked her to come to her place. But if she were used to living on the streets and being invisible to others, she supposed you took kindness with a grain of salt and the admission that you might have to give something back. She didn’t want to be someone that took advantage of her. She saw the situation from a different perspective. When she was younger, she had lived out of a car with her mom and younger brother. Her father had died suddenly leaving them with nothing, not even the house they lived in. It took them over a year of living out of the car, eating out of trashbins and from handouts before they were able to get back on their feet. Her mom eventually ended up falling in love with her step-dad at the second job she had taken and he took them in, providing them with stability. She knew her fairy tale ending was definitely not what other people living without a home usually had and she felt blessed. Being homeless for that year had taught her to never underestimate your will to survive, to just be able to live day to day. When she hung out with Marissa, her memories of that time came flooding back. She knew she couldn’t necessarily equate what she had gone through to whatever Marissa had lived, but she knew that this might very well be her chance to offer someone that was having a hard time the opportunity to help themselves. Her senior year in highschool she had been accepted to an extremely hard arts program in the city. Her step-father owned the brownstone she was in and instead of selling it, had let her use it. The place was definitely big enough for another person and even though she loved having a place she didn’t have to share after living in close quarters in the past, she found she wanted to be able to give Marissa something she could see she wanted and needed. And something about her made her know she could trust her. Just instinct. Marissa stirred slightly, her face pressed against her neck as she held her from behind. She felt her hand go to Marissa’s which was against her chest. She felt Marissa’s body tighten and then relax as she woke up, their bodies settling into one another again. She had left the window slightly open last night and the breeze lifted over them, stirring the curtain lightly. The phone ran next to her, the volume on low. She eyed it, then reached for it, hearing her brother yelling at someone in the background. Marissa rolled onto her back and she did the same, looking up at the ceiling. “Let me call you back,” she said to him and hung up a moment later. “My brother drives me insane,” she said softly, rubbing her eyes. Marissa sat up, perching herself up on her hands, looking as if she should leave. “You owe me breakfast,” she heard herself say to Marissa, laying on her side. Marissa looked down at her, looking confused but nodded. “Do you know how to cook?” she smiled. Marissa’s mouth curved, “Sort of?” her voice was a little hoarse and she felt a sliver of desire run up her back. “Sort of?” she teased. Marissa smiled, sitting all the way up, “It’s been awhile.” Janey nodded. “Well, I’m going to take a shower so when I get out..I’m hoping to find some eggs and toast at the least,” she winked, sliding out of bed. She heard Marissa laugh softly as she went into the bathroom. Yeah, she wanted her to stay. Hopefully she would. ______________________________ Marissa shoved the rest of her stuff in her bag as Janey was coming back into the living room. “Thanks for letting me hang out,” she said to her, standing awkwardly in front of her. Janey sat on the arm of the couch looking up at her. “I…I have a proposition for you.” Marissa watched her silently, feeling wary. “Do you want to…stay here? You know…until you find a better place? You wouldn’t have to pay rent or anything like that,” she said softly. She felt hope bloom inside of her. Stay here, with her? The room was silent as she processed the fact that this was actually happening, that Janey would even want her to stay. “It’s okay..I just thought..” Janey started but Marissa stopped her, “I’d…yeah, that would be cool.” “On one condition though.” Marissa nodded. “No parties after 1am and you have to make me breakfast like that at least once a week,” she smiled. Marissa grinned and she laughed. “I..I think you might be too good to be true,” Marissa said finally, fiddling with the bag in her hand. Janey shook her head, “I Escort Ümraniye just want..to give you the chance to get where you need to go.” Marissa felt the lightest she’d felt in a long time. “Why?” she asked, curious. Janey stood, only slightly shorter than her, their eyes meeting. “Everyone deserves a new lease on life.” She studied her, saw the strength in those eyes along with the compassion. “I…I have a job..I can’t live here without giving you something.” She helped out a guy a few times a week loading and unloading trucks off the dock, under the table. It was only a bill each time, but she had stashed some of it, using the rest to eat. “Yes, you can. Marissa, I’m not asking anything of you,” Janey said softly, her hand resting on her side. Marissa felt confusion and grateful at the same time. She looked up, waiting for some white light to tell her she had died, that this was what heaven was supposed to be like. Janey went towards the kitchen and pulled out a drawer near the fridge. She slipped something on a piece of metal, then handed it to her. “Key to the house.” Marissa took it, staring. “You trust me?” Janey looked at her, “Do I have reason not to?” Marissa shook her head. No, she didn’t. “I would never betray your trust.” Janey nodded. Janey didn’t know her from Eve, but she was damn lucky that Marissa had a strict moral code she lived by. She didn’t know how Janey knew she could trust her, but she did. Maybe karma was finally paying off. “I have to get to class. Will I see you later?” she asked, putting a bag over her shoulders. “Yeah,” Marissa nodded, thinking about her other bag full of belongings she had over at the shelter. They walked towards the front door and Marissa stopped. “Janey,” she hesitated. Janey opened the door slightly, looking up at her. “Thank you.” Janey nodded. Marissa reached out, slowly and they hugged for a long moment. She wasn’t normally a touchy person, but somehow Janey made her feel like she could be. That it was okay. Janey took the bus uptown while she walked down into the city. Her hand was in her pocket grasping the key tightly. She still felt like this was some sort of trick. That it wasn’t really happening. That someone was going to walk up to her and tell her everything was a joke on her. That she would get back to Janey’s and find the place no longer existed. She looked over at a large clock hanging from the market wall as she passed. She had to hustle to make it over to the loading docks. She had the job for a few months now and hadn’t told any of her aquaintances on the street about it. She knew if she did, they would try to push her out of the job and take it themselves. She had only made a few real friends the entire time she had been on her own and all of them were quite a bit older than her, a different generation that had been on the streets forever. Some of the kids were transitory, runaways who eventually had gone back home. Some of them got into drugs heavily and OD’d. Others got into prostitution which she found happened with the guys more than the girls she knew. She had thankfully not found herself tied to any one thing or spot and had up and moved when scenes became a little heavy. She didn’t make attachments because people were always looking for a way up and out and she found when they left, they didn’t leave anything behind, including their friendship. She had met one girl a few years back. She had just showed up one day, sleeping under the tunnel near Battery street. She had literally tripped over her when she had gone under to escape the rain. The girl was filthy, only covered by a thin windbreaker, her eyes large and scared. She couldn’t have been much younger than her. She had waited out the rain with her, her hands going inside her bag and pulling out a snack bar for both of them. The girl had looked at it as it was an alien and then she had taken it tentatively, nearly swallowing it whole. The rain had persisted and she had seen her shiver. She had pulled out a long sleeved shirt, one of only two she had and had handed it to her. The girl looked up at her then at the shirt. “Take it,” she had said to her softly. The girl reached for it, then put it on over her clothes, it dwarfing her. She huddled closer to her and she let her, their backs to the wall. The girl had finally fallen asleep curled up next to her as she had sat watch. A little while later another kid had come under the tunnel making a racket, waking the girl up. She had sat up slowly, disoriented but as soon as she saw the guy, she had felt her tense, scooting back next to her as though for protection. She recognized him, had seen him around. A jerk. He had no sense of right and wrong, was mean-spirited. He had never messed with her even though one time they had almost got into a scuffle at a gathering a few months back. He was intimidated by her and she didn’t mind one bit. Just a punk kid trying to asset his power in an unstructured environment. His eyes went to the girl and then to her and his feet stopped him from coming further. He looked indecisive as though he wanted to come closer but her eyes never left his, as she stretched her legs slowly, starting to get up into a crouch. He stood still for a moment and then turned, heading back out the way he came. She had no problem fighting if she had to. Had done it more than once before and never lost, even if she was pretty beat up a few times. She used her past athleticism to get by. If you showed weakness out here, you would always be taken advantage of. She stayed on her haunches, looking towards where he had disappeared. “Stay here for a minute,” she said to the girl, heading towards the end of the tunnel. She knew from the way the girl had reacted to him that she had run into him before. And it hadn’t been a pleasant experience. She knew his reputation, and knew he had probably taken exactly what he had wanted from her, possibly looking for her so that he could come back again to do the same thing. She despised women haters and men who used power to control them. She liked guys just fine, but not ones that exploited and used women. She poked her head out of the tunnel, then stood to her full height. The kid was standing at the top of the embankment in the rain, looking mad. She looked up at him, waiting. Finally he turned, heading down the other side of the hill. He would be back, of that she was sure. She stood for another moment, then headed back into the tunnel. The rain had started to drizzle and she reached the girl, crouching again. “Do you want to come with me?” she asked her. She never offered, never asked for companionship, never needed it. But she knew this girl wouldn’t last out here if she stayed by herself. The girl nodded, getting up, looking so sad bundled up in her shirt. She put her bag on her shoulders walking to the other side of the tunnel, only one way out down the other side of the hill, a gate to the right. She had taken them to a guys place she knew where they could be safe for the night. She hung out with him here and there before and knew she could trust him. She had only stayed at his place once and hoped he would be okay with her bringing someone, which he had been. They had slept in a spare room, him sleepily handing them clean sheets for her to make the small bed with. They had taken showers in the small stall in the half bathroom attached to the bedroom and the girl had put her shirt back on, slipping into the bed. Clean, she looked small and fragile and quite pretty. She had locked the door, then came into bed with her. The girl had lay next to her, shaking slightly and she realized she was crying. She felt the girl push into her and she held her as she cried. The streets were no place for a girl like her. She would be abused before she could say boo. Maybe time on the streets would harden her, but it would take awhile to get there, if she survived. She had stayed with her for the next month, floating from a few places to the streets as she tried to keep her safe. One night towards the end of their time together, the girl had sought out her body for comfort and she gave it to her, being gentle. They had slow sex, shutting out everything for a little while. It had felt good to be with someone in an intimate way without the feeling of obligation, no strings attached. And then one day she had disappeared. Hadn’t come back that night to the shelter. She spent the next week looking for her. Knew she was gone. She hoped she wasn’t lying somewhere dead, that maybe she had made it to a better life. Sometimes that meant going back home, a lot of the times it didn’t.