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Walking out of the bar into the cold air, I felt a little stupid. Had I really just walked out all because Dylan was talking to some girl? The fresh air cleared my thoughts and I was now definitely rethinking my abrupt departure. I could have spent a little more time trying to wrap my head around whatever this thing was with Dylan.
The more I walked the more I pondered what exactly it was I wanted. The answer was that I had no idea. I was definitely very attracted to her and my body was clearly responding to that but could I really imagine myself in bed with a woman? Touching her, having her touch me? How different could it really be? Pretty different I decided. For one thing I didn’t really know how to please a woman, obviously I could get myself off but doing it to someone else seemed different. Guys were so much easier, no messing around, if he’s hard he wants you. You can pretty much treat all dicks the same and get a good outcome. But women? More complicated for sure. That was well evidenced in the varying experiences I’d had with the men who’d been in my life.
A short train ride later and I was opening the door to my flat.
“Hey stranger” Jess exclaimed as I flopped down on the couch.
“Hey, flying solo tonight?” I asked, thinking about the potential need to utilize my earphones again.
“Yep, Jason just left. Gotta give the poor guy a break” she winked at me.
Jess has been my best friend for years, we’d originally met through mutual friends when we’d both moved to the city. Not really knowing too many people we had naturally gravitated towards each other. She was my confidant, biggest cheerleader and I regarded her as family.
“Speaking of flying solo, Jason has a really cute friend…” Jess started.
“Oh right” I started but my thoughts immediately flew to Dylan.
Jess started babbling about some guy called Nick who apparently was cute and funny and smart and didn’t I think it was time I got back out there.
“I dunno Jess” I began, shaking my head slightly.
“Babe, it’s been 2 months since your break up.”
“Yeah I know, it’s not that..”, I blushed and looked away from her when she raised her eyebrows at me. As I turned to look back I felt a pillow hit my face that Jess had just launched at me.
“You shit! You’ve been holding out on me!” she exclaimed. “Spill”.
I blushed deeper as a small smile played on my lips.
“It’s nothing” I said.
“Like hell Jo Andrews, you never crush on anyone!”, “Who is he?”
My stomach dropped slightly at “he” but I didn’t correct her.
“Just someone I met at work” I said evasively.
“A hot someone? What’s his name?”
“Dylan”, Thank god for gender neutral names I thought to myself. “Very hot”.
“Do you think he’s interested?” Jess’ interest was clearly piqued.
“I have no idea, We’ve only just met” I answered, again careful to avoid pronouns but Jess didn’t notice.
“What’s his surname?” Jess asked, whipping out her phone to log onto social media.
Shit. “Oh he’s not online, don’t bother” I said quickly.
“Not online? Who’s not online in this day and age?”
I shrugged at her non-committally.
“Well I think it’s definitely time you go out there”
“Oh yeah?” I smirked at her.
“Definitely. Have some fun girl, you work too hard.”
I rolled my eyes at her.
“So are you gonna make a move or what?” She pushed, not letting the issue drop.
“No! I don’t even know how to make a move” I blurted out.
Now it was her turn to roll her eyes. “Flirt Jo. Show a little skin, be a little touchy. Jesus, drop your pen and bend over in front of him. Just do something”
“Their probably not even interested” I said looking down.
“Don’t do that! How many times do I need to tell you, you’re a babe! There’s probably not a guy this side of the city that wouldn’t want you naked in their bed!” She grabbed my hands to empathize her point.
“Ok fine, I’ll try I guess” I said resignedly. It would make sense to at least test the waters to see if Dylan’s interested. That way if not, I can put things behind me once and for all. If she was though…I guess I’d work that out when we got there.
“YES!” Jess yelled in triumph. “Go get him girl!”
I woke up Monday morning after a restless night thinking about what my next “move” would be. Again, I was unusually attentive to my outfit choice, deciding on a fitted navy dress that finished about my knees and showed a hint of my cleavage at the neckline. I was applying the finishing touches of make up when Jess walked into the bathroom. She looked at me appraisingly before nodding her head.
“Wear your hair down” she instructed me. I removed my hair tie and let my hair fall free, settling again just above my breasts. “Perfect” she grinned with approval.
Sitting on the train a short time later I noticed I was getting some glances from the men on the train. Feeling a little buoyed that I did indeed look good, I walked into R&G canlı bahis ready to start my exploration of whether Dylan could be interested. It wasn’t until late morning that I ran into her on my way to the photocopier.
“Hey you” she smiled broadly at me. “Where’d you disappear to the other night?”
Oh. In my haste to work out how I was going to flirt I had kind of forgotten about my sudden exodus from the bar on Friday.
“You looked busy so I thought I’d leave to avoid cramping your style”
She cocked her head at me questioningly.
She laughed, surprised by my answer.
“You wouldn’t have cramped my style, besides I’m a great multi-tasker” she joked. “Here I was thinking you had left me hanging because you’d left with someone”.
I shook my head and leaned forward to grab my papers from the copier, giving her the opportunity to glance down my cleavage. Her eyes seemed to fleetingly skim down at me but they didn’t linger too long.
As I turned to look up at her I noticed Anne rounding the corner.
“Jo! Dylan! Great timing, can you both join me for a sec?” she asked, indicating her office.
Dylan gestures for me to walk ahead, hopefully taking the opportunity to look at my ass from behind. I put a little extra sway into my hips for her.
Anne closed the door behind us.
“So as you both know we will be pitching to Faber Inc in a few weeks, I think it would good for you both to take the helm for this one”
Dylan nods and asks Anne about the timeframe.
“I want this to be your primary focus” Anne says to us. “Landing this would be a big step in the direct we want to go”.
I feel a little nervous at the prospect of being responsible for such an important task but Dylan seems completely at ease, taking it all in her stride. Of course she is I think as I glance at her. Maybe it’s her confidence that I find so attractive? She’s so self assured and ok it doesn’t hurt that she’s a lot of fun to look at. I realize I’ve been staring at her whilst I’m having these thoughts when she glances my way and her lips quirks up into a tiny smile.
Before I know it, Anne is ushering us both out of her office while announcing she has every confidence we will get the job done. Standing in the corridor with Dylan she smiles at me. “Looks like we’ll be spending a lot of time together” she says.
I nod my head, hoping that she can’t tell how enthused I am with the situation.
“Listen I have to run but I’ll email you a time to catch up?” she says glancing down at her watch.
“Cool” I nod and turn to leave. I hear her phone ring as I walk back to my office and glance back at her. She’s standing exactly where I left her and, although she’s now on the phone, her eyes are still firmly locked on me. She glances away when she sees I’ve caught her looking and runs a hand through her hair. As she does her bicep flexes slightly and I swear I can almost feel my panties hit the floor. God she’s gorgeous I think to myself. And now I’m going to be spending a whole lot of time getting to know her!
Over the next few weeks Dylan and I spent almost all our time at work together. We definitely worked hard but this was interspersed with periods of genuinely getting to know each other better. As we became more comfortable around each other we seemed to naturally find ways to touch each other. She would pick lint off my shirt, I would playfully punch her arm when she made a joke. For my part I was resigned to the fact that I was definitely into her but I found it hard to tell what her feelings were towards me. Certainly there had been times when I felt her gaze on me or her eyes would linger for a second longer than necessary on particular parts of my body but I wondered if that was just wishful thinking on my part.
Jess was no use to me in this regard as she kept insisting I needed to be forthright and make it known if I wanted Dylan. I had continued to avoid the use of pronouns when discussing her so Jess remained unaware of the true reason for my hesitance.
The night before our pitch we were both working back late in the office. I was adjusting a spreadsheet when she leaned over to look at my work from behind me. I was painfully aware of how close she was to me and I could smell her perfume as she clicked away at the computer. In that moment, I wanted her to touch me. Up until this point I had been enjoying the flirtation but there were still doubts in my mind about being with a woman in a sexual sense. As I felt her shoulder up against me and felt the heat from her body, I had the urge to kiss her. Just as the thought crossed my mind, she leaned back away from me.
“Looking good” she said “I think that does it”. She walked around the desk and stretched her arms in the air, causing the bottom of her shirt to ride up and give me a heart stopping glimpse of her toned stomach. I blushed crimson when I noticed my mouth had dropped open at the sight. Then realization dawned on me.
“Hey – you were wearing that bahis siteleri shirt yesterday” I blurted out.
“Oh” she said glancing down at herself. “Yeah I didn’t have time to get home to change it”.
Her words hit me straight in the gut. She hadn’t been home last night. She’d spent the night somewhere that wasn’t home. I felt a surge of pain that I hadn’t expected. She was an attractive woman, had I really thought she had been sitting at home thinking about me? It seemed ridiculous now that I thought about it.
“I usually keep a spare in my office” she continued.
“Well aren’t you the boy scout, always prepared” I snapped.
Her eyes widened in surprise and she cocked her head to look at me.
“You don’t keep a spare set of clothes? Maybe if you spend the night at your boyfriends or something?”
I swallowed and shook my head. “No boyfriend”.
I swear I noticed her lips curl into a smile for a second.
“Is that where you were? With your girlfriend” I asked abruptly.
She smirks at me and shakes her head. “No girlfriend”.
She walked around the desk and closed the distance between us and I stopped breathing. But she had only come over to remove the USB from the computer. I quickly turned away and grabbed my purse to go. As we walked out of my office she placed her hand on the small of my back to guide me through the door, my breath caught at the contact but I wasn’t sure she had noticed. Outside the building we went our separate ways and I was left with my head whirling with conflicting thoughts. I thought back over all the small encounters we had. I tried to contextualize them by imagining she was really a guy, and I immediately came to a conclusion. If this was a guy I would think they were into me. I was doubting myself because Dylan was a woman and ultimately this was therefore completely uncharted territory for me. I felt like I was flying a little blind but the more I thought about it, the more I was felt the signs were there. She remembered small things I had mentioned about my life and when I spoke it felt like I always had her undivided attention. I smiled at the thought and felt a warmth rush through my body. I liked her I realised. This wasn’t just an attraction, it was full on – got a crush, imagine what it would be like if we were together – liked her. In fact, I hadn’t been the least bit interested or even registered anyone else since I’d met her. The warmth I’d felt a few moments before were replaced with panic. Taking a deep breath I decided to needed to talk to Jess about it, this was too much to process on my own. But not tonight. I needed to have my focus squarely on the pitch tomorrow and make sure my head was in the game.
I woke up feeling nervous and that feeling persisted all morning. When I arrived at R&G I immediately went in search of Dylan to do some last minute prep. Finally, I found her in the kitchen making coffee and chatting casually to a colleague. How can she be so relaxed? I thought to myself, I was basically having heart palpitations thinking about our day ahead. When she noticed me standing there gawking at her, she smiled and turned towards me.
“Hey you” she said, again glancing the length of my body and apparently approving.
“Hi” I managed to squeak out. ‘Can we run through things one more time before we set off?”
An hour or so later we had exhausted all aspects of our pitch and I was feeling slightly more at ease. We decided to make our way down to the train station. Dylan could obviously tell I was nervous so she kept me chatting about non-work related things to keep my mind occupied. Arriving at the station I was very glad we had decided to make our way down a little early. The station was packed due to an interruption in the line and the first train that came, we didn’t get anywhere near.
Finally we made it onto a train, packed together like a can of sardines. Due to all the jostling it wasn’t until the train started moving that I registered how tightly I was pressed against Dylan. I could feel her whole body against mine, the swell of her small breasts against me, the hard yet soft feel of her body through her clothes. She felt amazing. The train suddenly jolted and she immediately wrapped one arm around my waist to steady me, while my hand landed on her abdomen just below her breasts. I looked up at her and my breath caught. She was so close to me, her lips only an inch or so away from my own. She was staring at my lips and I felt her pull me into her slightly.
I wanted her mouth on me right now. Kiss me I thought desperately as I bit down on my lower lip. For a second she leaned down towards me and I instinctively parted my lips. My whole body was screaming as I anticipated her kiss. But her eyes flitted up to stare at me for a second before looking away. She seemed to let out a slow breath and her grip on my waist lessened.
She doesn’t want me. I felt the sting of her rejection acutely. There was no doubt she knew I wanted her to kiss me and she hadn’t. I wanted the bahis şirketleri ground to swallow me up. Thankfully the train pulled into the station and I quickly put some distance between my body and hers as other travellers began to empty out. Stepping off the train I was red with embarrassment. How could I have let this happen? I thought bitterly. We walked to Faber Inc in silence as I determinedly avoided looking at her.
Arriving outside the building she grabbed my elbow but I quickly pulled away from her.
“Are you ok?” she asked quietly.
“Yeah sure, let’s get this over with”.
“Jo, I-” she started but I quickly cut her off.
“Don’t forget to lead with last quarter’s figures” I interrupted, keen to discuss literally anything but what had just happened.
She seemed unsure what to say for a second but quickly collected herself and nodded.
“Ok, let’s do it”.
A full week later I had done my upmost to actively avoid coming into contact with Dylan. The pitch had gone well but we weren’t expecting to hear back til the end of the week. For my part, since that day I had been in a horrible mood. Even Jess had told me (unhelpfully) that I needed to get laid before I killed someone. The rare moments that Dylan and I had been in the same room together I had done my best to exit as fast as possible by feigning imaginary meetings and work that required my urgent attention. I knew she wasn’t buying it but every time I saw her, the embarrassment of our train ride came rushing back. I was still moodily brooding over the situation when Anne burst into my office and announced that we had successfully landed Faber Inc.
In spite of myself I smiled broadly and felt a rush of pride that we had successfully got the job done.
“We are going to celebrate in ten minutes, bar across the street” Anne beamed. “Jo, I knew you guys could do it, well done”.
I couldn’t help but smile when Anne left, and immediately I wanted to speak with Dylan, but my ongoing embarrassment kept me from setting off to find her. No doubt she would be at the bar and with that in mind I headed to bathroom to check my appearance. Standing in front of the mirror I reapplied my lipstick and, on a whim, decided to unbutton my shirt so that my cleavage was more noticeable.
20 minutes later I was in the bar, letting Dan from marketing buy me a second drink while I was being roundly congratulated by my colleagues. Dylan was also there getting her share of praise but I had largely managed to avoid her. Suddenly she appeared at my side with a drink in hand.
“Hey – I got you this” she smiled and she went to hand me a gin and tonic. Just then Dan appeared by my side with the drink he had bought me.
“Oh thanks, but Dan has me covered” I smiled at him while throwing a wink his way. He winked back at me, clearly he had notice my less buttoned shirt even if Dylan hadn’t.
“Right, ok” Dylan said, setting the drink down on the bar but not leaving my side. I ignored her and turned my attention back to Dan until I felt her move away.
All the rest of the night I felt hyper aware of her presence and multiple times I felt her eyes on me. Given all my colleagues were keen to buy me a celebratory drink, I was definitely on my way to being well and truly drunk. Making my way outside to catch some fresh air, I stumbled on drunk legs when I felt strong hands catch me.
“You ok? That familiar voice asked.
I struggled of Dylan’s grip. “I’m fine” I mumbled. But I was not fine, I was very drunk and I knew she could tell. Letting the cool air hit my face I took a deep breath and tried to stop my head from spinning to no avail.
Dylan guided me over to a table and pulled out her phone.
“I’m going to get us an uber” she told me.
“Us?” I asked.
“Yes, I’ll make sure you get home ok, where do you live?” She asked me while typing away on her phone. I wanted to protest but there was a part of me that liked her looking after me so I quickly told her my address.
Standing by the curb as the Uber pulled up, Dylan still had her arm wrapped around my waist, steadying me. She guided me into the back seat and slid in alongside me. She reached over to buckle my seatbelt and my breath caught as her arm inadvertently brushed against my chest. She looked down at me and our eyes locked. For the second time in a week I was sure she was going to kiss me, but as quickly as the moment happened, she looked away from me again.
The feeling of rejection once again burst into my chest. “What is your problem?” I exclaimed before I could stop myself. She looked at me incredulously and says nothing.
“Do you want to kiss me or not?” I burst out, feeling my face flame as I say the words.
Dylan stared at me in surprise. “You’re drunk” she said.
I turned my body away from her and looked out the window. “You don’t want to kiss me” I muttered.
“Don’t be ridiculous” she snaps. Before I can respond the uber pulled up to the curb and she’s slipped out. She opened my door and the cold air hit me, my head began to swim and I grabbed Dylan to steady myself. The last thing I remembered before passing out was her strong arms lifting me to carry me into my flat.
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